Dear Son,

How are you doing? I received a call from your class teacher yesterday. You submitted your History notebook, when the Maths teacher was one by one collecting everyone’s homework notebook. Haha. A touch of class about that son. I know you have not made your class work notebook, let alone homework. How do I know it? You are my son, after all.

Hope your introduction to Porn has been completed. (At your age, you will enjoy it. Later on, it’ll lose its sheen and purpose.) I am bringing fresh stock, this summer. The only job that I have given this intern hoping to learn from me the ways of this industry, is to exploit the office Wi-Fi for that purpose.

Also, read the sexpert column in Mumbai Mirror, regularly. Lot of knowledge there. And there’s always that crazy bit of humor. I saw this one yesterday,

“My wife tells me I do it like a dog. Please help!”

“As long as you learn the art (probably some monkey tricks), your wife will not have any issues.”

Please take care of your mother. No need to take care of your homework, marks, or anything as unpleasant as them.

Anyways,

Take care,

Your loving father.

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